There is no doubt that separating a family is not easy, and unfortunately, children can often suffer the most in this situation. Children are caught in the turmoil and this can be damaging to one’s mental health due to fast changes and the feeling of uncertainty. That is where collaborative divorce comes in. This process not only allows families to manage these changes with guidance, mutual respect, open communication, and shared decision making, but it also ensures a child-centered approach to safeguard the children’s emotional and mental well-being.
Traditional litigation can intensify parental conflict, which can can children to be exposed to troubles and trauma as well. Litigation is typically used for more complex family situations but it is not a guarantee that it would be helpful for the given family dynamic. Instead, it can provide long-term emotional and mental damage to the children involved by the constant battles and win-lose scenarios. On the other hand, collaborative divorce can empathize with your family dynamic and provide a peaceful resolution for all. During this process, parents work together to come to a civilized agreement that works best for all parties.
A great advantage that the collaborative approach offers is a more well-rounded, child-centered, decision making process. “In a collaborative divorce, children are shielded from hostile courtroom exchanges, reducing their emotional distress. Parents work together to create consistent parenting plans that prioritize stability, maintain routines, and foster a sense of security.” (Nicholes, 2024). The approach focuses their attention on the best interests of the child which is now why the collaborative approach stands-out amongst the traditional litigation. The plans created from a collaborative process are tailored to the children and each decision is unique to match with each family situation.
Additionally, the collaborative approach can become a model for the children involved. Parents learn the importance of cooperation and have the opportunity to build a foundation based on civility. If parents continue to showcase their communicative relationship in front of their children, their children will learn that not all separations or divorces should end up in a tragedy. The collaborative approach can also be used to preserve the foundation of the family and can protect the children from learning negative behaviors from witnessing the family loss.
Lastly, by going the collaborative route, parental involvement would increase, which ultimately can protect the children from long-term negative behavioral, emotional, and mental effects. Avoiding the traditional litigation process, spouses leave their divorce better equipped to a co-parenting style without the win-lose acknowledgement. Proving to the children that individuals can work together by being open and honest with each other can allow children to go through the challenging transition with peace. Protecting children’s well-being is the focus of the collaborative approach and it intends to stay that way by allowing all processes to be in the best interest of the child.
Nicholes, C. (2024, October 1). Collaborative Divorce: a Child-Centered approach. Cedar Counseling & Wellness.